The Sorting Hat
by Stromsten
Summary: Summary: Are Slytherins really the 'evil' House?  Does an 'evil House' even make sense?  Rose and Scorpius analyze.
1. The Hogwarts Express

Chapter 1: The Hogwarts Express

It was inevitable that Rose Weasley would share a compartment with her newly minted arch-rival after boarding the Hogwarts Express for their first ride to school. Rose resembled her mother, in bulldog tenacity, and physically, with frizzy hair and large, expressive eyes; however, their coloring of auburn and green were thanks to her father. Now that the train was underway, and they had finished waving at their parents, her wingman was her cousin Al, who was sitting beside her more quietly than usual. The cousins ignored the pile of puzzle books they had brought for the trip, but they ignored it for different reasons.

Albus Potter looked nothing like Rose's side of the family, but seemed to be a clone of his father, including his father's quiet temperament. While Rose had been at Platform 9¾ being warned by her father against the boy now sitting across from her, Al had been on the platform being reassured by his father that the family would still love him no matter which of the four Houses at Hogwarts he joined, and furthermore, that Al's own choice of House might determine the result of the Sorting ceremony. This amount of free will and adult responsibility required a lot of thought from the eleven year old.

Consequently, Al seemed as shy as ghostly pale Scorpius Malfoy, who had no wingman as he sat facing the challenging stare from Rose. She needed to assess the intellectual threat he posed, following her father's command to "beat him at every test." There was a tradition of baiting first-years with outrageous stories of what awaited them at school, none more ridiculous than those of the fearsome battles of the Sorting ceremony. Because she already knew the truth about the tradition from her parents, and about how students were placed in the Houses, Rose went with this as her first salvo.

"So, what do you think the Sorting's going to be like? Think it'll be a troll this year, or wrestling the Giant Squid?" She peered wide-eyed and attentively as she asked, desperate to analyze his reaction.

Scorpius had been sitting rather stiffly, mirroring Rose's attention to him, but at the question, sat further back into his seat with what might have been a sigh and a quirk of his lips. Irritated, Rose added before Scorpius could answer, "My parents faced a troll."

He answered with his eyes closed, "The Sorting is done by the Sorting Hat. However, your parents facing a troll makes you Rose Weasley." This was true. A troll had been trapped in a girl's bathroom during her parent's first year, and Ron Weasley and his friend Harry had rescued Hermione, Rose's mother. Scorpius crossed his arms over his chest, looked back at Rose, and added, "My father went to school at the same time as yours, you know."

Rose glanced at Al for support. Al merely nodded absently at Scorpius, internally debating Hufflepuff House vs. Ravenclaw and Gryffindor House vs. Slytherin. She sat back, crossed her arms and said, "Fine. You're a Malfoy and I'm a Weasley, and I'm not allowed to marry a pureblood."

Scorpius blushed. "I haven't asked you to marry me. Yet. You sound angry about it."

Rose inhaled sharply to deny what he had said, but held her breath as she couldn't quite work out why.

Rose's father was really at fault for this unusual conversation; it had not occurred to Ron Weasley that he was putting ideas in his daughter's head. After telling Rose to beat young Malfoy at every test, Ron had then tried to keep her away from Scorpius, by telling Rose that her grandfather would not accept her marrying a pureblood. This was important news to the conscientious girl, and she had blurted it out to the boy she had just met because it concerned him, too.

Now, it looked like the girl and boy from opposing families were going to spend the rest of their school years imagining marrying each other. Their wide eyes gazed deeply and wonderingly, considering new questions they were too young to answer.

Al suddenly looked up and joined the conversation, allowing Rose to breathe again. He asked Scorpius, "What House do you think we'll be in?"

Scorpius was prevented from answering when the door to the compartment opened, admitting three more Weasley/Potter cousins, who took Rose's and Al's presence as invitation enough on the crowded train; Rose's glares had kept out previous seatmates. If Scorpius were discomfited by being outnumbered, he made no sign. They all shifted to accommodate the newcomers, who put their bags away on the upper rack. Cousin Dominique sat quietly, but the others did not.

"So, firsties, all getting sorted into Slytherin, are we?" Cousin Fred's sense of humor was not gentle; his father owned a joke shop. He knew that Uncle Ron had threatened to disinherit his children if they weren't sorted into Gryffindor. He sat next to Al.

"Aye, tha look reet shifty t'me." Al's older brother James had for some reason adopted an atrocious Scottish accent. He sat next to Scorpius and opposing his brother. "Canna have them contaminatin' th'other Houses - Slytherins fer sure." He stung all three first-years; Rose, because of her father's threat, Scorpius, because his family had always been in Slytherin, and Al because of the weeks of prior teasing by James, corrected only by their father's advice just previously on the platform.

Righteous indignation fueled Al's retort: "I think Slytherin will be happy to take me." He looked across the carriage to claim a new ally in Scorpius. "Score agrees with me, I bet."

"Certainly." Scorpius blinked at his new nickname, but was happy to oblige his new wingman. Rose blinked at the sudden shift in loyalties, and the confusing twinge of jealousy she felt. Score continued, "A younger brother often needs to be cunning, and it is natural to have ambition sufficient to get out from under an older brother's thumb. These are traditionally considered prime Slytherin qualities by those who don't know better." Everyone blinked at this.

Since everyone else was now staring at him, Score felt called upon to elaborate. "My mother taught me how the Sorting Hat really works."

Dominique spoke first. "Everyone who's been sorted knows how the Hat works. The four Founders valued different things, and the Houses promote different virtues: bravery for Gryffindor, loyalty for Hufflepuff, curiosity for Ravenclaw, and ambition for Slytherin." Dominique looked down her nose repressively at Scorpius as she finished.

Fred contradicted, "I thought that Gryffs were loyal, and Puffs hard-working."

James added, "And Claws are smart, and Snakes are sneaky or cunning, or whatever." Though he was verbally disagreeing with Dominique, he joined her in looking down repressively at Al and Scorpius.

Though he had no idea of what Score meant by "how the Sorting Hat really works," Al was quick to defend his new friend. He challenged James, asking, "Aunt Luna was a Ravenclaw. Are you saying that she's not brave or loyal?"

Rose added, "Are you saying my mum's not intelligent?"

A silence followed this dangerous question; both of Rose's parents were proud Gryffindors. Doubting Hermione Weasley's intelligence was like doubting water's wetness, and so insulting to the family as to amount to a declaration of war. Rose refused to look at James as she spoke, but as she looked at Score, she realized that she had irrevocably joined the side of the boy she was supposed to beat at every test: the boy who had not asked her to marry him. Yet. She blushed bright red.


	2. The Sorting Ceremony

Chapter 2: The Sorting Ceremony

Not sure what else to do, Scorpius tried to resume his explanation. "See, Houses are said to share virtues, and any one person can show all of these virtues. Mother says that the contradictions should be obvious, but people take the Hat's Sorting poem at face value."

Malfoy was muffing it; whatever was self-evident to his mum continued to elude the Weasley/Potters, three of whom had vacant looks as they tried to recall the exact wording of the poems they had heard at other sortings. Even Al was just giving him polite attention.

Rose swallowed her blush and resolved to start thinking. Score was distracting, but she could beat him. She cleared her throat and took an academic tone. "Let's accept that the current explanation is inadequate. Therefore, the next questions should be: how are the houses divided, and why?"

Scorpius smiled and nodded in gratitude that somebody understood him, especially the fierce redhead who kept staring at him. Both of his new friends had green eyes, but Rose's emerald eyes were somehow deep and demanding. Scorpius resolved not to be distracted, though he didn't take his eyes from hers.

He replied, "Exactly. So if we ignore the why, or assume it is a consequence of how, then we have…"

"Then we have just have four random choices. No, we have four answers!" Excited, Rose sat forward and patted four spots in the air between her and Score. He scooted forward toward her imaginary playing pieces. She stared at the air, fluttered her hands, and rearranged the pieces into a grid. "It's a four-position decision matrix."

The older students glanced back and forth at each other to see if any of them had any clue as to what Rose was on about. Al stared at the air containing Rose's imaginary objects. Rose and Score nodded at each other, oblivious to anyone else.

Rose loved solving puzzles; she didn't know whether she were beating or joining Score, and at the moment didn't care. She grinned and bounced in her seat as she gave the most complicatedly accurate conclusion she could: "The Houses describe a field of two and only two covalent statements, each of binomial distribution!"

There was a moment of silence.

"She's gone mental. Absolutely barking." This was Fred's reaction. James looked queasy at such large words coming from a first-year, while Dominique simply ignored the conversation in favor of assessing the body language of the unexpected relationship developing between her young cousin and a definite outsider. Score quirked his lips into a smile and bowed in submission at the impressiveness of Rose's correct answer. Al kept frowning at the air.

He asked, "So what you're saying is that one corner is AA, the diagonal is BB, and the other two are AB and BA? Four combinations from two things?" Al looked up to get confirmation from Score and Rose. Distracted from looking into each others' eyes, they nodded at him.

Fred suddenly thought he understood Al, at least. He leaned forward and pointed back and forth between Rose and Malfoy. "So, mental."

He pointed back and forth between Al and James, saying, "Not mental." Next he waved dismissively at Malfoy and James: "Prat." He ended with a polite gesture at Rose and Al: "Not prat."

James started to shoot a rude response at Fred, but Fred talked loudly over him. "THEREFORE, according to Malfoy's mum, Al, being a non-mental non-prat, is a Hufflepuff. Rose is a mental non-prat, making her Ravenclaw. Jimmy-boy is just a prat, so Gryffindor; while Malfoy as a mental prat is a perfect Slytherin." Fred crossed his arms and smirked, having effectively insulted everyone whom he felt needed it, while using their own arguments against them. He nodded in satisfaction at Dom, who was failing to hold back her laughter, though she held her hand in front of her mouth.

She gave up trying, and laughed, "Oh, your faces!" She then reminded Fred, "You know that means you're a prat, too, Gryffindor."

Fred looked innocently toward Heaven and admitted, "Honesty is a virtue." Al and Rose finally smiled at this; James and Scorpius did not. Aware that Rose was watching his reaction, Scorpius grudgingly admitted to Fred, "You are close to being right."

Rose jumped in, asking Score, "Thought versus emotion is one of the choices, isn't it? Or thought versus action?"

"Yes. Slytherin and Ravenclaw are the analytical houses." Score smiled at Rose, then looked back at Fred. "Puffs and Gryffs aren't." Turning back to Rose, he added, "Teamwork versus individual effort is the other axis of the grid. Hufflepuff and Slytherin are the team-building houses." Score clearly had no bias against Slytherin.

James finally caught on. "Wait. You're calling Gryffindors stupid loners? That IS mental."

Safely back on academic ground, Scorpius reassured James, "No, action-oriented and self-reliant best describes your house. Hufflepuffs are action-oriented teams, which is why they're supposed to throw the best parties."

"Nonsense. Puffs are pants at Quiddich; that's a team sport." James was sure he had the little Malfoy there. Fred was sad to disagree.

"Puffs don't always win, but they always field a competitive team, who stick to well-rehearsed plays. Our team depends on the strengths of individual members, which means much less consistency." Fred shrugged in apology to James. James nodded thoughtfully back, the earlier teasing forgotten in light of serious Quiddich discussion. They started challenging each other's position with statistics and recollections of past games; the first-years were smart enough to shut it whilst ahead.

Al, Rose, and Score were thus spared from further efforts to crush their new friendships, and they passed puzzle books back and forth for the rest of the trip. Dom, however, watched closely from the corner, gathering evidence for later use. She felt that Fred had failed as a Sorting Hat; the new students were clearly Ravenclaw.

**AN: So, end it as a two-shot, or keep going?**


	3. Morning Owls

Chapter 3: Morning Owls

_Dear Mum and Dad,_

_I suppose I should tell you before you hear from anyone else that Lily Luna has not been sorted into my House. I don't know how much I can look after her, but I'm sure she'll land on her feet. She has been good enough to inform me that her parents have not forbidden her from marrying Scorpius Malfoy, and that she might undertake to rescue me from otherwise certain temptation. I have told her that Granddad will not let her marry a pureblood._

_Love, Rose_

_P.S. Malfoy has not asked me to marry him, yet._

Rose bit her quill; she regretted adding that final 'yet.' Still, it was technically true, and, as she failed to notice that the letter was more about Score than James' and Al's little sister Lily, she rolled it up and owled it before snatching a quick bite of breakfast. She had also failed to notice that she had completely ignored her younger brother Hugo's sorting into Gryffindor; she was much more concerned that her obligation to look out for her cousin had been discharged.

As she went to her new third-year classes, her thoughts kept going back to last night's Sorting, reviewing it as was now her habit in light of Score's Mum's Sorting Hat Theory. Lily Luna Potter certainly seemed to believe in the traditional "Gryffindor good, Slytherin evil" theory. Evil? Why would there be an evil House? That didn't even make sense! Finally having a free period, Rose sat in one of the few comfortable seats in the Library, closed her eyes, and reviewed the evidence.

_The Hat gave a traditional poem, which was either better or worse than last year's unexpected rap; it depended on one's view of rap, Rose supposed. More people than usual were paying attention to the Sorting, because Lily, Hugo, and cousin Lucy were the last of the Weasley/Potters for the foreseeable future. (Cousin Victoire had only married Ted Lupin last summer, so it would be at least twelve years before they sent a child to Hogwarts.)_

_However, Rose, Al, and Score always paid attention. James and Fred thought that Rose took notes to help them place bets, but she really did it so that she could discuss Sorting theory with reference to actual data._

Rose sensed Scorpius sitting down near her, and handed him the list without opening her eyes. He took it with a slight crackle of parchment, as though by straightening the page he also organised the information on it. The habit made Rose smile.

_Botham, Alastair!_

_HUFFLEPUFF!_

_As the first 'ickle firstie' was not someone known to her, she just wrote down the information. Lily, Hugo, and Lucy all had predictions that would be written before the Hat's decision, then crossed out if not in agreement with the Hat. Rose successfully pegged all three: Slytherin, Gryffindor, and Hufflepuff, respectively. She also correctly placed her roommate's little sister, Aeronwen, into Ravenclaw. Now the question was, was the theory proved correct by these successful predictions, or were these coincidences?_

She asked Score, "So, confirmation or coincidence?" She had not discussed Lily's proposed 'rescue' of Rose from temptation by Scorpius and had no intention of bringing it up. Rose was handling the situation quite well, thank you. After all, he hadn't even asked her out on a date. Rose conveniently failed to recall that, as this was the first year that they were old enough to be allowed to visit Hogsmead on approved weekends, there had been no opportunity for him to ask her out previously.

Score pursed his lips into a frown. "Mm. Hard to conclude with a small data set - we could claim success for all three theories."

She loved it when he did that; it made his lips so kissable! _What? _Rose snapped her eyes open at the thought, and locked them on Scorpius' lips. _Merlin, where did that thought come from?_ How did she know what his lips looked like with her eyes closed? When had she started noticing his lips so much, and more importantly, had he noticed?

_She's glaring at me again._ Why was Rose angry? "You talked to them on the train. They all saw the possibility of ending up in the Houses they did. The Expectation Theory is just as valid at this point as the traditional story or my mum's theory." Scorpius spoke quietly and cautiously to calm his fierce redhead down. _Wait - my fierce redhead? No, she's not mine; she's not allowed. I have to stop getting like this every year!_ He blinked and shook his head.

The Expectation Theory of Sorting belonged to Rose's roommate 'Mad-Dog' Maddocke. Mad-Dog (Branwyn to her family, Bran to her roommates) became the Seeker for their House's Quiddich team last year and was unusually single-minded about the sport. It was, therefore, all the more surprising that she would volunteer a theory on something other than Quiddich.

Mad-Dog's theory was simple: everyone had some idea of the reputations of the Houses from friends or family. Even friendless muggle-borns would get the general idea from the Sorting Song, or poem (or rap). Therefore, all the Hat had to do was to get the 'sortee' to express a preference, then announce it. No actual decision-making was needed.

"I don't believe it. Why would a mind-reading hat be needed merely to validate the students' choices?" Neither Rose nor Scorpius had spoken; the objection came from Bran's little sister. Aeronwen glided, in a ladylike fashion, into a seat by the older students. She was remarkably similar in looks to her sister, with pale Welsh skin, black Welsh hair, and big, grey eyes set in a heart-shaped face. Both Rose and Scorpius could tell already that her gracefulness would set her apart from the tomboyish Mad-Dog. Both blinked and shifted uncomfortably, even though the conversation had outwardly been completely impersonal.

"Well," said Rose, "I raised the same objection to your sister, but I have to admit that the appearance of objective decision blunts criticism from family and friends. Why aren't you in class?"

The little girl stood up with a look of ladylike and nearly believable contrition. "I may have made a bet with Albus about the Sorting." She plucked the sheet from Scorpius' hands and scanned it quickly. She then put it in her bag as she reprimanded Rose, saying, "You didn't give the results to James or Fred at breakfast, and we needed them before dinner tonight." James' and Fred's tiny enforcer then turned and left without another word as the older students stared after her.

"What are you going to do with another one?" Score asked, turning his head back to Rose. "I think two of them count as an entire Welsh Independence Movement."

Rose answered, "I think she actually reminds me of Lily." Considering Lily's glee at being Sorted into the 'evil' House, this was not a compliment. Rose was suddenly very tired of younger siblings, hers and everyone else's.

Score changed the subject, attempting to sound nonchalant. "So, Rose, want to go to Hogsmead with me? I mean, on the first weekend?"

_Oh, Merlin._

**AN: So far, we know that Rose is not in Slytherin. Are Al and Score with her, or are they in different Houses? Oh, and what do you think of the Expectation Theory?**


	4. Tea With Hagrid

Chapter 4: Tea with Hagrid

Hugo Weasley felt confused and maybe even overwhelmed. His first week at Hogwarts had gone by, with all the pressure and confusion felt by any new student, but family pressure added to the sense that he was failing school already. And homework! He had homework already, and no idea how to handle it. Cousin James had at least seemed glad that Hugo had been Sorted into his House, but seemed happier to have won a bet about it. The Gryffindor common room seemed impossibly crowded, and the crisp autumn day whistling outside the windows became impossibly enticing. He made a break for it, and escaped down the stairs without anyone noticing. Of course, no-one would have stopped him.

Elsewhere in the castle, specifically down several storeys in the Hufflepuff Cellar common room, Lucy Weasley felt much like her cousin, and decided to visit Professor Hagrid's hut on the edge of the Forbidden Forest. This came from concern for her housemates. She knew that she paced, especially when pressured (her much older sister called her "bouncy"), but she didn't want to disturb the other students who had made her feel so welcome. While she didn't like the idea of wandering outside all alone, having a goal, and having someone to talk to at the end of it, gave her back a sense of order. She was on her way before she finished thinking of it. Her roommates wondered where she was going in such a rush and why she hadn't said anything to them.

Lucy and Hugo met on their way out, and Hugo somehow ended up escorting Lucy to visit Hagrid, even though the old family friend hadn't mentioned his usual invitation to tea this year. The two cousins looked like brother and sister, with their slightly reddish brown hair and hazel eyes, as they set out across the lawn under the bright, fluffy clouds. Lucy chattered while Hugo pretended to listen. He didn't really mind as they cut through the wind, warm in the jumpers their grandmum had made, because Hugo was the youngest boy in the family, and only got to do manly things like 'escorting' when with Lucy or Lily. Hugo missed Lily, a bit. They had not spoken since riding the train to school; they hadn't even whispered during the Sorting. He made more of an effort to talk with Lucy.

"Rough flying weather, though I suppose the teams play in even worse." As if to punctuate his statement, the wind gusted dramatically across the lawn and over the black loch, changing the color of the water to steel grey and back. He was secretly glad for the warming charm Grand Molly put on each jumper; it wouldn't look terribly manly to shiver while the sun was still shining. Lucy swallowed a sigh, used to being interrupted. The wind lessened as they got closer to the woods and Hagrid's pumpkin patch.

"Are you going to try out, then?" Lucy's voice held a note of doubt. First years weren't even allowed brooms. Everyone she knew complained about the rule, including the Minister, especially as first years also had mandatory flying lessons, which had to be done on the school brooms. However, as the rule had a long tradition of existence, it continued to exist. This proved that Hogwarts was not merely a school for magic, but far more importantly, a British school for magic.

"'Course I am, it's tradition! Have to fly for Gryffindor, don't I?" Hugo realized that perhaps this might have been insensitive to his Hufflepuff cousin. "Err, how 'bout you? Hufflepuff having tryouts?"

Lucy stopped in the middle of the pumpkin patch. She honestly hadn't thought about it before, but being a Hufflepuff instead of a Gryffindor meant that there weren't more family members than positions available on her team. Her eyes brightened and she literally jumped with glee.

"Yes! Thank you, Hugo, that's a great suggestion!" She giggled. Hugo turned back to Hagrid's hut and they walked to the end of the patch as Hugo suggested further, "'Course, we don't want the school brooms; we'll want to borrow brooms from the family, yeah?" Lucy narrowed her eyes at her cousin's profile as they stood in front of Hagrid's door and knocked. What is it with boys and not talking directly with a person? And what was he implying about borrowing brooms - wouldn't the family help?

Hagrid came out, and the cousins were immediately distracted from the half-giant by the sounds of puppies from behind him. Uncharacteristically, the big, shaggy grey-haired man did not invite the children in, but stepped out of his hut and shut the door behind him as he spoke. "Hullo, there. Can't come in, can't come in. Don' wanna upset the pup, now. Little ones get scared, y'know."

"Can we see the puppies? We promise to be quiet!" said Hugo.

"Oh, please, please, please!" begged Lucy, with a hop.

Hagrid snorted and drew himself to his quite considerable height. "Now, how old are you two, then? No, it's a fine day to talk outside." Another gust of wind followed this statement, drawing a moan from the Forbidden Forest. Hugo and Lucy each quietly wished that they had worn their school robes for this trip. It was also true that the youngest members of their large family had been used to getting their way by being cute.

"No Lily, eh?" Hagrid frowned, suddenly seeming to remember the youngest Potter, and taking her absence personally. The cousins glanced at each other guiltily.

"Erm, well…"

"We didn't think to invite her along. We really haven't seen her since… Well, you know."

"Haven't seen her? Yer ha' ev'ry meal with her in th' Great Hall, same as I do." Hagrid frowned down at the pair. "Not tha' I mind seein' yer here, mind."

Lucy blinked, weighing what to say, but Hugo just blurted out his concern. "Do you think that Lily is evil, now?"

"She acts like it," interrupted Lucy, who crossed her arms and frowned back at Hagrid.

"Even Rose thinks so, and she doesn't believe that Slytherin is evil," Hugo finished.

Hagrid's eyes widened in distress, and his grey whiskers bristled as he puffed his cheeks in and out a few times. All the Weasley/Potters knew of (and generally shared) his pro-Gryffindor, anti-Slytherin attitude, but as Professor Hagrid, he had to be unbiased toward his students.

He cleared his throat and began. "Well, now, the War showed that good an' bad folk can come through any House…" he trailed off. He cleared his throat again and bristled his whiskers. "An' wi' parents at the Battle, here, it's hard t' imagine…" Hagrid sighed and bristled again. "Why, even young Malfoy is a decent sort, see. No, no, I'm sure it's just her getting after James fer teasing her like he did young Albus." Hagrid remembered and respected the late Albus Dumbledore, so Al was always 'young Albus' to the old giant.

Lucy breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh, good. Thank you, Professor Hagrid. Let us know when we can see the puppies!"

Hugo wasn't finished. "So I should listen to Rose instead of James?"

"Why, she's top o' her class, isn't she?" Hagrid smiled, bristling his whiskers in a more familiar direction. "And James likes a good laugh. O' course, there's others to talk to in the castle, yer ought to remember." He chuckled. "I'll be sure t' invite you fer tea, soon."

Hugo staggered under Hagrid's friendly pat on his shoulder, and it was obvious that it was time for him to escort Lucy back inside. They trudged back, glad for the sun on their faces. Hugo mulled what they had learned while Lucy chattered about her relief, and how she really didn't believe that Lily would abandon her family, and while Lily was bossy, that wasn't really evil, was it?

Hugo spoke when they were almost to the doors. "We both heard more than one puppy." He looked directly at his cousin, expecting agreement.

Lucy blinked. He seemed more serious about the puppies than Quiddich. "Of course."

"Hagrid didn't say he had puppies. He said 'pup', singular. One puppy, Luce." He kept staring into her eyes, but she didn't see what was important, and shook her head. Hugo got a strange gleam in his eyes, and an odd smile on his face.

"Luce, don't you remember the story about Fluffy?"

Lucy gasped as she did. Fluffy was a giant three-headed dog that Hugo's parents and Uncle Harry had discovered guarding a secret passageway in the school. They had survived that adventure when they were first-years, too. Lucy suddenly understood Hugo's expression as a thirst for adventure. She shook her head harder.

"Oh, no, no, no. I'm a Hufflepuff. You brave lions can handle it." She ran back inside, to the safety of her badger housemates in the Cellar. Maybe she could borrow a try-out broom from one of them, and not have to talk to anyone in the family at all. Ever.

**AN: Sorry for the delay posting; I try to post weekly. Also, I don't own Harry Potter or anything else belonging to J.K. Rowling.**


	5. The Restricted Section

Chapter 5: The Restricted Section

Rather below the cellars, on the other side of the castle in the dungeons, Lily Potter tried different smirks and evil smiles in her bathroom mirror before giving up and returning to her dreadfully uninspiring and thoroughly blank letter to her parents, her first since her Sorting. She sighed and gave it a dirty look. Maybe she needed fresh air; it was already past lunch. Lurking in the dungeons _sounded_ mysterious and scary, but was really rather dull, especially on a Saturday, and especially if nobody knew she was doing it.

"Nobody" in this case really meant her family, or… Scorpius Malfoy? Lily huffed, and threw her things into her bag, then headed to the Library. Surely, Rose, Hugo, Al, or Scorpy would be there at some point, though the thought of Rose and Scorpy together hardened Lily's face into a fierce frown that was much more intimidating than anything she had practised in the mirror. She marched through her common room and into the castle with her robes billowing about her. Some of the older students smirked or raised eyebrows, silently assuming that she was 'acting Slytherin' according to the stereotypes held by Gryffindors like her family.

Lily stormed into the Library, not quite realizing that she was failing to be appropriately quiet. The dark look from the Librarian stopped her momentum and she took a deep breath, schooling her face into a more dignified appearance, or so she thought. Lily's new favourite expression was disdain; it looked rather laughably artificial on her young face. She did not know that she had yet to come across anything in her life other than her brothers and cousins to give her disdain a real animation. Even so, she was often secretly fond of her brothers, and the mask of haughty contempt faded from her face as she looked about for her family.

Rose, nearby, continued to quietly read aloud from a list from the Defense Against the Dark Arts class: "…Welkinstrider, Wolpertinger, Vuvuzela." She, Al, and Scorpius were in a comfortable corner of the Library that they had claimed for their own in their first year, near a window for light and near the Restricted Section for privacy. The chains on the books in the Restricted Section occasionally clinked ominously, but never actually rattled, unless Peeves the poltergeist were involved.

Rose sometimes gazed through the entrance to the section at the end of the library, not because she had any morbid interest in the Dark Arts, but solely for the beauty of it, the gleam and shadow of the loops of chains hanging from the books and attaching to the shelves, a hanging carpet of chains and leather, no book ever out of place or missing. It was an altar of secret knowledge, this library within a library, and Rose imagined her inmost heart to be the same.

Of course, her inmost heart was not dedicated to evil, nor did it hold much in the way of secrets. One secret it did hold was her newfound dislike of her roommate's little sister. Aeronwyn just seemed a little creeper to Rose, and now Rose was a bit paranoid of being found again in the Library.

Thus, when Lily poked her head around the shelves, Rose only saw the silhouette of a dreaded first-year, and reacted. Rose dropped her list and darted back out of the line of sight. As Lily walked toward her brother and his friend, Rose ran around the corner and tapped up the steps into the Restricted Section. Fortunately, she was out of sight before the Librarian looked up. Rose made her way back near to the window to see if she could hear her friends over the other side of the bookcases.

Lily billowed up to the boys and stopped just as she stepped into the line of light cast through the window. Al silently admitted with a smile that it was a good entrance, almost like apparating. Scorpius had been looking down the aisle where Rose had disappeared, and he blinked at the sudden appearance of Al's little sister through the black cloud of her robes. Her satisfied expression alarmed him a little, and he blinked again.

"Hullo?" _Brilliant, Scorpius. Brain of Britain, here._ Blink.

Lily's face blossomed into a triumphant smile, and she took a deep breath before responding, "Good afternoon, Scorpy."

Al and Score glanced at each other; it was hard not to laugh knowing the other was trying not to laugh. _Scorpy?_

Rose blinked, in a habit that she did not know that she had picked up from Scorpius. _Scorpy?_ _That doesn't sound like Aeronwyn._ She pressed herself close to the books carefully, to avoid clinking the chains.

Lily moved forward and sat down in Rose's spot. "I'm glad I caught you. I need to write Mum and Dad and tell them about being Sorted." Her rueful smile did not amount to a smirk, and was more honest than she intended. She wasn't able to act at all superior with Scorpy actually looking at her. "I thought you might help," she added quietly.

Al answered, even though his sister wasn't really talking to him. "Thought you were evil, now. Surely you can drop them a little mocking taunt about how they've failed as parents?" His tone was more gentle than his words.

Rose's hands silently closed on the chains in front of her. _He's talking to Lily! _Should she go back or keep listening?

Lily blushed and looked down at her hands. "Al, you won't betray my secret, will you? You of all people know that James deserves it, and I can't trust any of the rest of the family not to tell him." She really didn't like the thought of Scorpy thinking her to be evil, she realized. Scorpius looked at Al to find out what was going on.

Rose gave the book in front of her a hard stare. _She doesn't trust me? _Staying put seemed the best option; the lack of trust was now mutual.

"Why don't you just tell Mum and Dad, and ask them to let Jimmy-boy stew over it? I don't see the problem." Al wasn't suspicious, just puzzled.

"Al, they're going to think I'm evil, too! House of Voldemort, remember? I know you and Rose have a different theory, but you've heard them all laugh when Uncle Ron says, 'Gryffindor good, Slytherin evil, and what the Hell is a Hufflepuff?'"

Lily rolled butterbeer-coloured puppy dog eyes at her big brother as she leaned toward her Scorpy. "You're the only one who took my side against James, Al." She turned her pleading gaze to Scorpy. "I thought you might understand it from the other side. How did you tell your parents you were in the wrong House?"

"Err…" Scorpius had never noticed the almost golden colour of his best friend's little sister's eyes before as they looked up at him. He had never thought about her at all, really. Now he felt uncomfortable both for ignoring her and because she was demanding something personal on the basis of this nonexistent relationship.

Rose, however, noticed the sudden softness of her cousin's voice and knew that Lily really had every intention of turning Score into Scorpy. Rose's hands tightened on the chains. _And she's only a first-year! She has no business flirting with him! _Her moral indignation had nothing to do with jealousy, of course. _When I was a first year, flirting never crossed my mind. I only talked about marrying him. _At this, Rose's knuckles turned white and her eyes could have burned a hole through the book in front of her nose.

Meanwhile, Scorpy shifted around in his seat, not meeting Lily's eyes as he tried to explain. "My family doesn't hold that Slytherin is the good house and Gryffindor the bad. Mother was a Ravenclaw, and she's the one who told me how the Hat works. Father won't say much about it, but he didn't disinherit me." He looked up at Lily with the same rueful smile she had had earlier. "I don't know that I can give you what you want."

Lily looked pained, but Al spoke before she could reply. "Dad told me a secret. When we were at the station my first year, he told me that it would be fine if I were Slytherin, that the Hat almost put him in Slytherin, and that the Hat would respect my choice."

Both Score and Rose were easily distracted by this tidbit, naturally. Rose made herself release the chains. _Now he tells us! _Apparently, useful information really could be found in the Restricted Section.

"Al! Why didn't you tell me?" Lily was mortified that her bonding experience with Scorpy was ruined. Rose was already stomping back to Score, her former favourite cousin, and her now least favourite cousin as quietly as possible, her own robes for the first time billowing intimidatingly.

Scorpius hissed (because there is no yelling in the Library), "Three years without _once_ mentioning this? You just let us go on and on whenever the Hat came up?" He was only irritated at Albus, but Lily looked up in hope that she and Scorpy could bond against Al.

Al defended himself hotly. "It was a secret! I'm the only person my Dad ever told about it - I'm not even sure I should have told you now!"

Right then, Rose regally and angrily descended the steps right out into the open, forgetting that she had no permission to be where she was. She stepped out into the view of her cousins and Score on one side of the bookcase, and into the view of the Librarian on the other.

The Librarian had been waiting. "Miss Weasley!"

**AN: Uh-oh. Where is this going? What about the rest of the family? What Houses are they in, really? Leave a review, thanks!**


	6. Detention

Chapter 6: Detention

"Miss Weasley!"

Rose froze. She blinked. She blinked again, and slowly turned her head to look at Ms. Edgecombe, who had bustled out from behind her counter and was barreling down on Rose. Rose swallowed, knowing that she was about to receive her first disciplinary action in her academic career. She blamed Lily.

Lily, Al, and Score stopped their conversation and looked toward the unusual (and unwelcome) sound of the Librarian's voice. They saw Rose standing defiantly at the entrance of the Restricted Section. Score didn't think, but got up and hurried to her side. Al blinked, and Lily's eyes darted back and forth between Scorpy and Rose as she wondered what to do. Lily and Al then looked at each other and got up and followed Scorpius.

They got to her side as Ms. Edgecombe did. The Librarian seemed rather oddly satisfied, underneath her heavy bangs and her show of indignation, as she took a deep breath and glared over her glasses at Rose. _I bet she was a sneak in school,_ Lily thought.

"I don't believe you have permission to conduct Dark research, Miss Weasley?" The Librarian's voice was oily, yet disdainful as she folded her hands together. She leaned back a little to look down her nose at the group. "Are you also involved in this violation of school rules? I'll have to talk to each of your Heads of House about the appropriate number of House points to remove."

Four sets of eyes widened in alarm; four brains quickly fashioned excuses and objections that were as quickly discarded in panic. Rose spoke before getting the others in more trouble: "It's the Sorting Hat, ma'am. I think it's a Dark object."

This was the last thing any of them expected to hear, Rose included. She continued to think aloud. "My grandmother says, 'Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain.' Where is the Sorting hat's brain? I had to -"

Al interrupted Rose, saying, "Mum says that, too, because she was possessed by a diary here at school. If Dad hadn't saved her, it would have killed her." He started to look queasy at the thought of a Dark object on top of his head.

Lily added brightly, "We don't actually know that it was really Gryffindor's hat; maybe we just think we do, because we've all worn it and it's affected all of us." This over-the-top statement was too much for the Librarian.

"Enough! I think I see what is going on here. Just because you imagine that there is some emergency does not give you permission to ignore any rules you wish." Ms. Edgecombe turned and glared down at Lily, the only student actually shorter than she. "You have obviously overexcited your relatives and friends with another of your wild stories. Not a week into term and already the talk of the staff is nothing but what Lily Potter has said now. Each tale is more ridiculous than the last. Your Head of House will doubtless owl your parents about how you got these other students into trouble after I report this to her."

As Lily began to puff up in indignation, the Librarian turned her still beady but slightly more kindly eyes to the others. "House points need not be taken from the victims of a prank. However, you will all serve detention to remind you that rules should be obeyed, and authorities informed if you are alarmed by something." She waved her hand vaguely at Lily as she said, "something." Lily looked ready to explode. She blamed Rose.

The Librarian attempted to look down her nose at them again as she finished her pronouncement. "You will meet me here to shelve books in the main - and not restricted - section. After breakfast, on the first Hogsmeade weekend." _Not Hogsmeade! _thought both Rose and Score.

"Now leave the Library." At this, Ms. Edgecombe returned to her counter, head held high, but her robes failed to billow intimidating at all.

Rose was a much more effective authority figure as the troupe trudged into the hallway. "Lily, what have you been up to?"

Lily turned on Rose like a cornered cat. "Me! You're the one looking up evil in the Restricted Section! You're the one who got the rest of us in trouble! You're the one who GOT ME BLAMED BY THE LIBRARIAN!"

Al and Scorpius squirmed a bit, uncomfortably realizing that they had done nothing to defend Lily. Al cleared his throat. "Err, are you sure about that? I mean, Rose didn't say anything about any of us…" He trailed off, for once at a loss for words. He glanced at Score for backup.

"More importantly, what if you're right? Has the Sorting Hat affected our minds in some way?" Score was becoming a natural leader, as the others accepted his calm demeanour along with the shift of topic. He blinked at Lily.

Nonplussed, Lily blinked back at him rapidly several times before answering, "How would we know?" Now that she wasn't yelling at Rose, she wasn't sure what to do.

Rose wasn't happy about being polite to Lily, either, but she answered, "We wouldn't be able to know. Not without Occlumency. That's N.E.W.T. level Defense Against the Dark Arts - we probably wouldn't be able to get a teacher or even an upper-year to tutor us in it."

"We have to get our information from unbiased sources, then. Right?" asked Scorpius. He began to lead the group down the corridor.

"Too right!" groused Al, who was absentmindedly messing up his hair in order to try to feel Dark magic on his head.

Rose huffed, "Oh, Al, please! I didn't say that the Hat was cursed." _I was just making stuff up as it came to me, but I can't admit that I was eavesdropping - not in front of 'Scorpy.'_

"Dark magic doesn't have to necessarily mean a curse," said Scorpius. "The further back we go, the fewer restrictions there were. The spells to make the Hat may well be in the Restricted Section today, while the Founders thought nothing of them when they created the Hat." His tone changed to one of grim determination. "We need to be able to get into that section." He gestured to an empty classroom, and they went inside.

Once again, only Rose was willing to speak up to Scorpius, as she sat down. Al and Lily also sat. "You heard the Librarian laugh at us. We'll never get permission to research the Hat in there. Even I don't really think the Hat's a danger, and I'm the one that called it a Dark object." Rose was looking down at the desk in embarrassment by the time she finished.

"Well, we won't present it that way. We'll simply say that we'd like to research how to make an object like the Hat as an advanced Charms project, and that some of the sources we need may be in the Restricted Section," explained Scorpius as he stood in front of the lectern.

Albus thought out loud, "Blood magic is primitive but strong magic, and it is considered Dark nowadays. How else would the Founders imbue the essence of their Houses into the Hat?"

"That's assuming that the traditional Sorting theory is true," noted Rose.

"Wouldn't the charms professor expect us to make an actual object? What happens if we can't make one?" objected Lily.

Al scoffed, "They'd more likely expect a three-foot essay. And not just the Charms professor; there's Arithmancy, Potions, and Ancient Runes that may be involved, too."

Score agreed, "They don't believe that students can actually accomplish anything of value. Not only can we make our own Sorting Hat, we'll need to make four of them."

"Four?" chorused Al, Rose, and Lily.

Score nodded.

"Yes, four: one for each theory. We're going to re-sort everyone in Hogwarts."

**AN: J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter, etc. Sorry about the delay and the reposting!**


	7. Classes

Chapter 7: Classes

Bran nudged Rose. "What're ye on about, then?" Rose's fairly helpless Potions partner liked to emphasize her accent from time to time. Rose glanced to make sure that the professor wasn't paying attention.

"_Amortentia_: the world's most powerful love potion. I need it for Scorpius." Rose's attention was divided between her assignment and what she planned to say to the professor to get the potion. She really did not realize how her soft words would sound to her roommate. "Maybe some _Felix felicis_ to drink, too. I have a feeling we'll need as much luck as we can get." Rose had decided that _Amortentia's_ property of smelling like the subject's three most loved things (or two things and a person for an in-love subject) was the closest she could find to a potion that analyzed desire.

'Mad-dog' Maddocke looked like a bludger had hit her in the solar plexus and knocked her from her broom in the middle of a match. She sat in her seat, not even pretending to pay attention to the class.

"Scorpius? Malfoy?" She then muttered something in Welsh that Rose couldn't catch. It might have been a prayer. To Branwyn's mind, obviously, Rose wouldn't make such a huge confession to anybody save her best friend. So, Branwyn Maddocke was up to the challenge! Maybe. What should she say? Bran swallowed, then squinted determinedly at Rose and stood up. "You don't need that. Just tell him how you feel." Bran crossed her arms and half sighed, half huffed in concern as she glared even more fiercely at her (previously unbeknownst) best friend.

This startled Rose into paying attention to her partner; Rose suddenly knew that she had said something wrong, because Bran was doing her best to support her. She appreciated the loyalty more than she understood why she needed it. What had she said?

The Potions professor also wanted to know more about their conversation. "Yes, Ms. Maddocke? Is there something you'd like to share?"

Branwyn was too honest to know what to say as she glanced from Rose next to her to Scorpius further up on the other side of the low-vaulted room. "Um?"

"I'm sorry, Professor," said Rose. "Bran's having trouble with the assignment, and I should be more patient with her. It won't happen again." Rose gave Bran a significant look as she said this, and the new best friend agreed with a nod. The Potions professor narrowed her eyes and her lips, but let it go with a nod of her own, and went on to another table.

"We'll talk after class," Rose whispered. Both girls went back to work.

After class, to Bran's surprise, Rose went straightaway to speak to the professor. Dominique, Fred, and James were the 'designated' pranksters of the Weasley/Potter family, though few suspected Dom, a secret to their success. Rose was supposed to be like her mother, the "brightest witch of her age." Of course, this was research, not a prank, right? Rose hugged her book in front of her as a kind of shield. "Professor Quirke? I was wondering about the place of Potions in creating magically talking objects such as, say, the Ravenclaw door knocker? I could do an extra-credit assignment, if you like."

The professor was younger than Rose's parents, but teaching had started to put suspicion lines around her eyes. Most of them had formed after prank attempts by members of the Weasley family. Professor Quirke deliberately kept her eyes wide as she answered Rose, "Yes, Miss Weasley? I take it you don't mean a Perpetual Polish."

Rose blinked at the professor's unhelpfulness. "No, ma'am, I was thinking more along the lines of some kind of wit sharpening potion, but I'm not sure how a wit sharpening potion could help something that's not alive? The Sorting Hat comes up with a new song each year, and the knocker a new riddle at least daily - well, at least it seems that way, but I don't think that they have pre-recorded responses, as the Hat, at least, is a thousand years old, and language has changed in that much time, you see." She took a breath, but the professor spoke first.

"Yes, Miss Weasley, that would be excellent. Three-foot essay on that before the end of the year. Thank you." She turned from Rose and went to the supply closet.

"Yes, professor, but I was thinking about more of a practical project. Maybe an object that answers questions?" _Something that allows me to use advanced potions without needing to hide it?_ Rose tried not to bounce on her toes in excitement.

Professor Quirke spun around with a frown and said severely, "Miss Weasley! A 'Magic 8-Ball' is a muggle toy. It is not filled with 'divining fluid' and is NOT an acceptable project. Your cousins James and Fred have already tried that prank. An essay will be quite enough." Both Rose and the professor's cheeks grew pink with embarrassment: Rose's at the accusation, Professor Quirke's at having been pranked. "Now run along to your next class before you're late."

Rose closed her mouth before she said something she would regret later, and turned and stepped in a controlled fashion to the door where Bran still waited for her.

Bran awkwardly put her arm around Rose as they walked to class. Rose didn't seem to notice, but she muttered angrily about James ruining things for her and Scorpius. Bran nodded in a way that she hoped seemed sympathetic. She was too scared of boys to have any experience with romantic troubles of her own; dealing with Rose was making her fear worse.

Up in the Charms classroom, Lily was even more frustrated; not with her cousin Lucy, though her cheerful chatter wore on Lily's nerves. She was not terribly frustrated with the gullibility of her classmates in general, though they really ought to have had the common sense to recognize when a girl is speaking sarcastically. No, Lily Luna was at her wit's end with her own inability to come up with some way of helping her Scorpy. Rose already knew all the spells that Lily was learning, and Lily's plan to make James sorry for teasing her about getting sorted into Slytherin was _seriously_ backfiring onto her.

She whispered to Lucy, "Honestly, the teachers believe _nothing_ I say, and students believe _everything_ I say. Does nobody like a laugh, or have they never had a leg pulled? I can't even tell if the rotten Gryffindor _cares_ since I only see him at meals."

Lucy smiled brightly. "Oh, no, Hugo thinks you're not evil. We talked to Hagrid about it, and he told us not to believe everything James says," she whispered back.

"Not Hugo, James! He really believes I'm evil? Or is this some kind of double-blind where he only _wants_ me to think that he thinks that, by making you think that?" Lily put her head on the desk. Her dark red hair shrouded her face.

Lucy's smile faltered. "You're mental. I didn't understand any of that. Are all Slytherins mental?" This got her dirty looks from the Slytherins around her.

The ancient Charms professor, however, frowned at Lily's extravagant despondence. "Miss Potter, your feather is not in the air. _Wingardium Leviosa_ is the spell, if you recall?"

Lily's day got worse when she swished-and-flicked her wand and incanted a muffled "_Wingardium Leviosa_" with her face to the desk. She immediately looked up when Lucy shouted, "Lily!" and the rest of the class laughed at the sight of Professor Flitwick in mid-air.

In pure reflex, Lily slashed her wand away from the tiny man towards the wall. Accordingly, the professor crashed into the wall, which knocked the wand from his hand. He shouted, "Miss Potter!"

She panicked and shook her wand, as though that would remove him from the effect of her spell; she bounced him into screaming Hufflepuffs across the room, then the ceiling and the wall behind her, more Hufflepuffs near her, and the chandelier. Flitwick managed to shout, "Put me down!" The worse it got, the more power Lily's emotions poured into the spell, gathering the class's feathers and even books into a swiftly moving cloud of unpredictable menace. Students stopped laughing and ducked under desks.

Lucy's eyes were wide with fear, and her mouth hung open with shock; she (like most of her classmates) clearly believed that her supposedly non-evil cousin was doing this deliberately, as they witnessed the professor swoop into the stacked books near his desk with a crash and the flutter of new books taking flight. Flitwick shouted, "Aaaah!" One of the bookcases fell over onto the desks at the front with a sound like an explosion, and more books clanged into the chandelier as the professor passed overhead again. "Aaaah!" The rest of the students had to quit watching and duck, while some of the more nervous students screamed and went for the door.

In the commotion, Lucy's disappointment caught Lily's eye, and realizing it cut through Lily's panic like ice down her back. Shocked, Lily suddenly released the spell and dumped her Charms professor onto the stone floor. The cloud of feathers and books dropped onto the heads of her classmates. Dust-filled silence reigned for a moment before the remaining bookcase creaked and fell over. Professor Flitwick moaned.

Every eye was on her, and Lily knew that this could only confirm her reputation as evil, forever. The Hufflepuffs regarded her with fear and anger; the Slytherins regarded her with disgust and anger. She weakly curled her lip, in what was not a smile, before she put her head back down on the desk, hard.

Then she realized she ought to be checking on her teacher. _Oh, Merlin!_

**AN: No, I am not J.K. Rowling, and do not own any of her characters or settings. I seem to have trouble updating weekly; thanks for the kind reviews, though! Lily Luna's stories that get her in such trouble will be another fic all their own (she's such a bad girl.) More Scorpius and Albus next chapter!**


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